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Simon

"you travel too much"

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This has finally hit a crucial point for me.

Many of you will look at my mileage #s below and agree, but I should preface by saying that I don't typically do YYZ-LHR (or whatever), stay 3-4 nights, then go home. I'll do 2, maybe 3 nights a week away. I never do 1-2 weeks away. I might even do YYZ-DEN-YYZ, YYZ-MCO-YYZ and YYZ-IAD-YYZ all within a week while spending no nights in a hotel.

How typical is the nights away thing and the complaints from others really amongst FF?

All I hear, from neighbours, relatives, gardeners, bank managers, etc. who talk to my spouse is "oh, he's gone again?" ...often with the follow up "wow, nobody else travels that much."

This is not helpful and I want to kick them all, but last night it reached a boiling point, and it was suggested I should never travel again. :cry:

Has anyone else faced this issue and successfully overcome it?

Simon

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Sorry to hear about that Simon :(

While I do not travel a much now (yet more miles are accumulated) I was never in a position to have to deal with any backlash ... neighbours are too out of it generally ;) and Mrs. PB never raised an eyebrow yet I am sure it crossed her mind many times - however I have only done 110K on AC this year so not anywhere near your numbers...now that I am about to embark on 4 straight weeks (back weekend day 1 or 2) she is raising an eyebrow now, but that is because she has become used to me being home!

Hope it works out for you mate!

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As long as you are home and "visible" on the weekends it should be ok. The fact you travel and avoid overnights wherever possible is pretty damn good IMO.

When I used to travel all the time I did the same thing and got some flack but that was only to make sure it didn't expand in more time away. Always tried and succeeded in being around when needed and to make sure the house worked or a set up was arranged to look after problems if the "janitor/maintenance man" wasn't around

Tell the neighbours to screw off.

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I see it pretty much the way Parnel does.

I spent the last five years of my career in continuous blocks of 12 nights away, 9 nights at home. It was unquestionably a strain on my wife, my daughter, and me, but we all understood it was not going to last a day longer than five years. It required a great deal of compromise to work well, and there were many chores and activities that were deferred. All in all, it worked; the benefits outweighed the negatives.

All I hear, from neighbours, relatives, gardeners, bank managers, etc ...

I found some people showed solicitude, which was fine. But those who felt they knew what was best for us? My wife and I are impervious to that kind of thing.

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This year I will only take five trips away from home. Two of them will have been with Mrs. Zorn anyway. Last year was more.

We are pretty tight and she gets upset whenever I go, especially when it's for four or five nights in a row. She has spent far more nights in hospitals than I have on business trips. I'm not sure if the irony is lost on her. We don't like spending time apart, with the difference being that I more supportive of her than vice versa.

I'm not sure why you'd care what retailers and neighbours think. But immediate family issues aren't anything that you can just "get over".

Either the family dynamic works around time away, or it doesn't. If it doesn't, you all have to make it work, or cut down the travel, or expect family tension.

I've probably experienced more of the other side of the issue with a spouse in medical residency and one and then two small children at home. It required substantial sacrifice on my part to make the family work. (In exchange, she had to sacrifice a substantial part of her sanity, and she will make a very good income, so I'm not complaining.)

Some people (I'm guessing men more than women) might go about their travels without being very open about why it's necessary. The few times my wife has been unreasonable with my travel I've found that it helps to explain what I am doing and the consequences of not going. You might think it's obvious why the travel is essential, but you'd be surprised how little spouse really understand.

I wouldn't worry about the children specifically, if they exist. They won't even remember you were away.

Anyone who isn't immediate family can go to hell.

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You're actually quite fortunate to have the flexibility to only be out 2-3 nights a week. I'm in the same position having obtained a senior enough position to have complete and unfettered descretion to book my trips the ways I believe would be comfortable. This means that although I'm out of town, it's only for short periods. In fact, my partner actually enjoys me being out of town for short periods :lol: because it's a well deserved break.

Who really cares what neighbours think anyway! It's what you do for a living and that's really none of their business.

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In fact, my partner actually enjoys me being out of town for short periods :lol: because it's a well deserved break.

She uses that time wisely to shop at non union places like Wal-Mart :lol:

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I understand your situation Simon.

Some of my neighbours have commented thaT I am travelling "a lot", "again","must be nice to always go somewhere special"........

Mrs. acysb87 is a special person and understands my need to travel.She even OKs an occasional MR. 8)

What bothered her was an unscheduled SFO trip over Thanksgiving.Other partners in my business backed away from a committment and I drew the short straw.Long story short,She was very disappointed as both our young adult children are home for the holiday weekend.

I don't care what neighbours,friends and co-workers think of my travel/business requirements.

I do care what Mrs. acysb87 thinks.She supports me 199% and I owe it to her to do the same.We are low key/profile people and our best friends understand what business is about and some of the sacrifices required.I am almost always home on weekends and will Try to have Mrs.acysb87 join me when possible.(my postings regarding IKK will attest to that.)

Am posting from MLLT1 on Thanksgiving weekend headed home for dinner. :oops:

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Some of my neighbours have commented thaT I am travelling "a lot", "again","must be nice to always go somewhere special"........

Translation..........."you lucky SOB getting out of YSB so often."

Mrs. acysb87 is a special person and understands my need to travel.She even OKs an occasional MR. 8)

Knowing you makes her even more special IMO :wink:

Am posting from MLLT1 on Thanksgiving weekend headed home for dinner. :oops:

There were probably some turkeys hangng out there.

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In fact, my partner actually enjoys me being out of town for short periods :lol: because it's a well deserved break.

She uses that time wisely to shop at non union places like Wal-Mart :lol:

So thats where all that cheap Chinese sh*t is comming from! :wink::shock:

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I used to take advantage of the company buying my travel to stay a day or two on my own to explore afterwards. Now the rule of thumb is to arrive as close as possible to the start of work, and to leave as soon as possible afterwards. What used to be five/six days away is not 3/4, or less if Im not in some far off Northern place with limited connections.

I'm also in the good husband category as the neighbours we choose to hang out with travel more often than me (but not enough to get status, which pisses them off a bit.) :P Having access to the lounge and seats up front also comes in handy with Mrs. CL.

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Simon - guess you don't want to hear that I travel > 120 nights a year, I think I will hit 150 hotel nights this year, with 2 kids. My only comment is that it is only too much if your SO says its too much. This summer at my daughter's soccer game some of the parents were wondering who I was - it was weird.

Good luck in making it work on the home front.

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Simon - guess you don't want to hear that I travel > 120 nights a year, I think I will hit 150 hotel nights this year, with 2 kids. My only comment is that it is only too much if your SO says its too much. This summer at my daughter's soccer game some of the parents were wondering who I was - it was weird.

Good luck in making it work on the home front.

Is there not a family resemblance? :shock: Maybe you were away one night too many!! :P:twisted::wink:

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............

There were probably some turkeys hangng out there.

I did not see you there.Where were you seated? :twisted::P:lol::lol:

If I'm the turkey...you're the stuffing :wink:

And just who would be the gravy for the mashed potatoes? ;)

Sanosuke!

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